4/10/07

This Weeks Funny MLM Story - Contest Winner

I won. I won! I can't believe it - this is just too damn funny. I recently did a post about Believe: The Movie - www.believethemovie.com - and while playing around the website, I stumbled upon the contest to send in a funny MLM story. Well, I went ahead and submitted one - AND I WON! - they cut the story off, but here is what you will see at the website under "Contest"....

Lisa Steptoe of Ellicott City, MD sent this amusing story about her 12 YEARS in the business and one of her more unique convention experiences:

My husband and I got in "The Business" back in 1991 and because my husband was really excited, I was a "supportive wife." We drove to our first function 4 days after signing up with our upline. My concern, of course, was where we were going to stay. No worries, we were told.

Everything is taken care of. We arrive at the hotel and, to my surprise, we were sharing a room (2 double beds) with 2 other couples and 2 babies under the age of 2. I immediately had a diva fit and sat in the corner until it was time to leave for the convention center.

At the convention center, it was complete pandemonium with everyone jumping up and down, spraying breath spray in the air and acting possessed.

They left off the rest of the TRUE story due to space. Here it is for your amusement (since I didn't save it as I originally typed it, I'm retelling it here)...

...I thought for sure that I was in an episode of Twilight Zone or something. We get back to the hotel room and sleep on the box spring since WE WERE SHARING A ROOM WITH SO MANY ADULTS and INFANTS. Definitely NOT a Diva Moment. We wake up the next morning and I "assume" we are going to get some breakfast before returning to the Matrix. I ask about where we are going to get some breakfast and my upline wife asks me if I would like a food bar since we are going to go directly to the convention center. BULLSH---! What I heard her say was, "Do you want a "FOOBAR?" I went OFF - like snapped. "What the FU-- is a FOOBAR? I ain't eatin' nothing I can't identify. What the FU-- is that SH--?" My upline wife is/was a nice, quite lady - unaccustomed to a wild card as myself. She responds with her usual two responses to a confrontational situation - "Well, Alright" OR "Yes, Indeedy". Since I was still an un-indoctrinated hussy, I responded with - "What the MF does that mean?" NUF SAID. I was hustled to the nearest "kiosk" where I could partake in a danish and coffee... FOOBAR my BUTT!.

Ron and survive the weekend and of course he is "FIRED UP." Twelve Years later - yep, I admit it. Twelve Years later and I finally get him to take the pill that jacks him out of the MATRIX. We did do okay in the business, but along the way we realized that you can make a helluva lot more money (and a lot faster) other ways. Thank GOD.

We never did anything too stupid (like invest in too many tools or functions) that would put us in debt - if it was going to be a financial burden - SCREW YOU! We didn't do it. Thus, the typical woes that you might hear about from other long time business builders about incurring a huge amount of debt and so forth - just didn't happen to us. Like I said before, we were always considered HERETICS. SO BE IT. Our residual checks are awesome and keep coming. Let's see how long that happens before someone gets wise and tries to figure out how we can get cut out from our line of sponsorship.

Anyway, I think this whole thing is just too funny for words. What makes it even more hilarious is that it is an true story. If you want to know more - email me. I've got not problem telling it like it is.